2011: Project 365- GiGi

In 2010 I participated in a Flickr inspired 365 day photo project and chronicled GiGi for a year. One photo, every single day, for a year. There were times that I felt annoyed with the tediousness of having to edit, post and share. It wasn't until I had gotten to the end of the year and began to edit my photos that I realized how perfect each and every one of them were, because of the subject. I found the week, the exact week, where GiGi started to become this little girl. I spent every day with her (with the exception of a weekend for my birthday and another - which still, by the way - had pictures that the sister helped me with) and if I had not done this project I would have never been able to tell you which month it was that her hair seemed longer, or that her face became thinner and her legs hung closer to the ground when she sat upon a park bench. August. August is the month her face morphed into a little girl and shed the image of a teeny toddler.

The 365 Project taught me a lot about my daughter and myself as a parent. I learned about this craft, this photography. There were times that I felt bored with the types of images that were taken, because there were indeed times when her sleeping face, perched upon a pillow were all I could snap before the clock struck midnight and my camera turned into a pumpkin. I hated that for days on end I would have to decide on whether or not to use the photo I had taken of her with my cell phone while she was brushing her teeth/ smacking the TV/ having a tantrum in time-out town was better than the one of her sleeping that I snapped with Nina Nikon. I loathed that those were my choices. So I put them off. I put off editing those photos and posting them until I had a pile of images to sort through.

When I looked at my set of photos and the last one read "day 211/365" I nearly pissed myself. Collecting images and sorting through my various eJournal entries in my Word Docs and figuring out how to mash them together without my head exploding was proving to be a massive challenge. Alas, I did it. I put on my big girl pants and followed through on a project I had so much fun doing at times, and whose final product I was sure, positive, I would love. Looking through the folders clearly marked with the date the image was taken proved to be a lot easier, and A LOT more time consuming that I had initially imagined, but it was doable.

I found the folders, one day after the next, with a mere 4 or 5 photos in each one, 3 out of those 5 blurry or over exposed and began to see the bigger picture. She was asleep in those photos, but on the other side of her little hands clasped together was a mound of textbooks. I didn't take her out and create some set/stage for a mini photo shoot because I was studying. I was in school. I fell asleep before I finished my online geography assignment, or wrote a paper on violence in the media. What I captured in those images wasn't just a little girl growing up, but myself growing with her. Those images reflect what *our* life was like in 2010, not just hers. Sometimes life was sloppy and tired and forgetful. Other times, our life was organized and blissful. There were days when I couldn't express (in words) to someone - or myself - how much loved her and a photo was the only choice I had left. The photos splashed humor and talent all over the place and punched me in the gut with irony sometimes. They captured firsts. They shut the door on lasts.

I love my kid. I love her more than anyone on the planet and I feel so lucky to have a record of what each day was like with her, for one entire year.

...and I want that feeling again.

This year, my 365 day project has gotten off to a mediocre start. At least, I thought this year had started that way, but yesterday I had a moment of clarity with regards to this whole thing. I knew that I wanted a challenge, something that I could push myself to do - raise the bar. So I've decided that while having a set of print for myself is an amazing gift, I want Gia to have a set as well. Whether there is any improvement in vision or not, I'm confident that large print may be a reading option in her life. I'm hopeful. Even if I'm completely wrong there is always the option to have things Brailled for her. This year, I've begun to make each image representative of how our day went sot hat I can look back and remember it. For GiGi, I've decided to tailor my entries to her, and her alone, and include what the image looks like so that she will have a better understanding of the photo.

I'm excited. Thrilled, really, to finally know how to get into this years project. I won't beat myself up for not posting every day, because chances are, I *won't* post every single day. I have school, and homework, and the park, and dinner...and story time, and a million other things to do and sometimes I won't make it to editing or writing and posting each day. It doesn't mean that I didn't capture a moment and that I don't have something brilliantly personal to share with my daughter. The pressure stays at bay this way. I'll try to give myself a short term goal of having a month unprocessed at a time and no more, but with today's date being February 3, 2011, I suppose I've already slipped up. Que sera, that's what this weekend is for.

... so with that, let the project commence!

(a visual sneak peek...)